On Misery: Latent Inner Strength

Rather than distancing myself from the Triumvirate of Misery (i.e. "...sad...grief...pain.") I use it as an opportunity to cultivate and focus my energy in order to enhance familiarity with myself. Misery draws (maybe drags is more accurate) my attention more fully in to the issues I'd prefer to forget or ignore. I can choose to face them instead of quippishly excusing the significance of addressing them or romanticizing my capability to cope with them. I give myself over to the sensation of misery, learn what I can from it, and move on. This is how I try to deal with my "Dire Wolves of Misery".

Currently, I choose to believe that their purpose for giving chase is to challenge me so that I might confront them and grow in my acceptance, love, and understanding of self, so to realize my potential. They enrich my life, guide, and nourish me. In nurturing my understanding of misery, what was once an intruder is now a welcomed guest. If viewed as before, then the purpose of the wolves is relegated to the act of mangling my existence. I assign them new meaning, and name them. I disempower them. They are well-behaved to the extent that I am aware and intolerant of their mischief. Misery's affect is in a person’s attitude towards it.

On Slow Reading

It is difficult for me to finish a book. I can, but not without dismantling it. I do not mean this in the sense of pulling its binding apart or tearing at its imposition until it resembles the remains of an old accordion although I have done so with a required reading or two in my time. My brain pores over each line of text with its fine-tooth comb, with the inquisitiveness of an Edward Stratemeyer character.

Reading can sometimes be very exhausting for me, but unfortunately for all the right reasons. Simply, I am intrigued and so I dismantle. I explore each sentence and word with an appreciation for their placement, and the understanding that a writer addresses their work with the same meticulousness and peculiarity of any other specialist, but mind you, specialists who rely on writing just the same. I want to know them. What are they saying? And, why? Much of what I read, be it fiction, biographies & memoirs, psychology, history, current affairs, cultural, multicultural, social, religion, reference, narratives, self-help, blog entries, and facebook posts, the similarities are stark. All that I've read consists of some central burden and intent with existence as its crux. The more I read the more I realize that this theme is an undertone being played out in all areas of life for all time. This seems valid irrespective of media or "progress".

Random Thought (#9,349,492,495,321,188,945...)

I'd like to celebrate Unhappiness as the precursor of Happiness. It has been given a bad rap, as Unhappiness is the less desirable of the two. Unhappiness identifies a present state of being. For some it is a destination; it is where they arrive at and sometimes remain. For others it may be viewed as a place of departure. It is a trailhead from which to begin ones journey toward fulfillment. With each instance of unhappiness comes the opportunity to experience happiness. Unhappiness is then the origin of hope. It is the assurance that happiness exists. It is up to each of us, however, to head in its direction. — A.O.Reed